Saturday, September 11, 2010

A Grind So Evil, Even Warlocks Fear It

The scene: somewhere in Northrend.

The player: a cryomancer, freshly minted 80 and still clearing quests.

As I’m gathering herbs, I realize that I’m close to hitting 450 in Inscription. I quickly gather my winnings, and teleport back to Dalaran, and start crafting those last few glyphs. And there we go. POOF. All done.

But, wait.

“But wait, Illume!”, Professor Pallin exclaimed. “You still have many more to learn!” 

“What? But you’ve taught me everything you know!”

“Ah, yes – but as scribes, we must research!  See those two spells in your spellbook – Minor Inscription Research and Northrend Inscription Research?”


“Well, guess what you need to do every day?”

So I did. Every day, I went out, gathered some herbs, ground them down, and did my research.

And then, one day, I didn’t get anything but scrolls. No new glyphs. I tried it again. And still – just scrolls!

“Professor! Professor! I’m finally all done!”

“Wonderful, Illume! So … you have the Glyph of Life Tap?”

“Life Tap … heeeeeeyyyyy …. what’s going on here? I’ve seen those up for sale!”

“I was afraid of that. You still have many more to learn, my friend.”

“But how? I’ve maxxed out my research!”

“Reading, dear girl! Reading!  Seek out and read every Book of Glyph Mastery you can find!”

“Where are these at?”

“Random drops, my dear. And good luck in instances. Everybody rolls “need” on these – even blacksmiths!”

Well, fortunately, thanks to Jas’ hard work in the Auction House, I’ve made this profession pay for itself. My share of the earnings has been put back into the AH by way of bidding on what passes for reasonably priced books.

And today, my friends … today, I cracked open one, and it contained nothing of any use to me.

“Bravo, dear girl, bravo!”, the Professor exclaimed, upon hearing the news. “You have truly attained mastery of our profession!  Here, have these complimentary coupons for the Legerdemain Lounge as a token of this guildhall’s esteem at your accomplishment!”

Note: if you finish this grueling process yourself, don’t dally. Those coupons generally expire the next day.

(Note: thanks to Xeppe for the inspiration on this one. It started out as a response, and ended up being a blog entry.)